After a messy break up, finding love again can feel like some kind of stupid myth or distant memory.
It doesn’t have to be.
It takes time and practice to believe in love again. Feeling love again and enjoying life after a breakup is a similar journey to losing weight or gaining strength. You need to flex your “love” muscles repeatedly. And no, not that one! The emotional muscles are the ones I’m talking about!
Some simple steps.
Let go of the baggage;
It’s easy to carry traits forward from previous relationships. Miss-trust, suspicion, caution, dishonesty, tit for tat, one-up-on-you behaviours, manipulation, sarcasm, selfishness, dependence, snooping, jealousy, even cheating.
All of these behaviours or mindsets carry weapons of destruction with them. Your next relationship won’t last unless you fully let go of these traits. Truth is, even your relationship with yourself is pretty unhealthy if you are carrying this dangerous baggage around with you. Kiss it goodbye.
Healing old emotional wounds is crucial. If you’re the walking wounded, you will be putting a repellant energy out there, rather than an attractive one. Open wounds keep you sore and sorry and can prevent you from being fully open to love. They can also hurt your relationship with yourself. Feeling wounded is a strong negative pull away from being happy. To heal emotional wounds, you need to stop focusing on it. Stop paying the hurt energy. Stop feeding it and giving it life. Acknowledge the hurt, learn from it, then pay attention to your future. Forgive, and move on. Forgive yourself mainly.
Other people don’t make up your mind for you. Outside situations don’t make you who you are. It’s your mindset which makes you who you are. It’s how you deal with your situations which makes you who you are. Decide to be great. Decide to be happy. Decide to feel loved. Decide to be healthier. Decide to be positive. Decide to go out and get what you want in life. Decide to be the best version of yourself. Make this decision every day.
When you are truly out there being the best version of yourself, you will be putting yourself in the way of other people who are also being the best version of themselves. You will be feeling so good about yourself that you will be opening up all sorts of opportunities for yourself. You will be so busy loving your life that there’s no time to waste on feeling depressed and lonely. Being the best version of yourself will immerse you with possibility. Practice this every day and pretty soon, look at you go. You’re back in the saddle and loving life.